Not long after my wife of nearly 50 years died, I began receiving e-mail versions of the casserole delivery. I can’t say I was invaded but I was certainly invited. What I found inexplicable was the volume of invites from unknown individuals … how did they even know who I was or that I was suddenly an “eligible senior”.
Mean Eileen arranged for most of the unsolicited emails to go directly to email purgatory (a.k.a. the junk mail box) and for those with subject lines particularly inappropriate for an AARP Gold Card member, they went straight to e-hell (no hand-basket).
However, a couple new ones escaped the auto-purge recently. The first one had a subject line that read;
Married but lonely. Search the largest site for cheating wives. Find neglected Lovely Wife to date today.
The second one had a generic subject line and I opened it without thinking;
I am a 35 yesr ol woman... I have had 5 kidds 4 with me on in heaven.. I hav been married snce i was 17 to my husband.. I think i am the ...
My opinion on the subject hasn’t changed, but obviously the options have increased exponentially. Men Seeking Women, Married Men Seeking Traveling Circus Performers, Women Seeking Teenaged Boyfriends, Bisexual Biracial Pagans seeking Hyper Religious Southern Baptists with RVs, Ex Wall Street Tycoons Seeking … well, you get the idea.
It’s a small wonder that divorce rates are over 50%. Getting married is like buying something at Nordstrom or Costco. You can take it back, no questions asked. Only in the marriage business you may not get all of your money back.