Chomped

Yesterday, my friends Howard and Claire drove 80 miles (round trip) to take me to dinner.  The restaurant they wanted to introduce me to was closed, so we went to Chompie’s which is conveniently located within walking distance of a hospital, a long-term care center and a cemetery.  Now, I’m not implying that a Chompie’s customer might subsequently require hospitalization, long-term care or a crypt, but as a long-time resident of Scottsdale, I can say that Chompie’s quality and value has slipped big time.
 
It looked promising … there was a large sign just inside the door advertising Jewish Sliders for .99 cents (regularly $6.99).  This apparently was a one-day only promotion that we had lucked into – and a popular one judging from the crowd.  While we waited to be seated, I approached the hostess and inquired about the promotion.  Interestingly, the hostess (who was standing next to the sign) said she did not know about the promotion.  Maybe it was her first day or perhaps she was a vegan trying to block out any knowledge of our fresh-baked-from-scratch mini challah roll filled with our moist lean beef brisket, real Jack cheese, our homemade potato pancake (latke) and our savory brown gravy.

When we were finally seated I watched in amazement as wave after wave of waiters & waitress emerged from the kitchen carrying trays of slider-laden plates. When our waitress took our orders, Howard ordered a chopped liver sandwich and soup and Claire, a chicken dinner.  The Jewish Sliders were still selling like medical marijuana so when the waitress told me I could order two or four, I held up two fingers, suddenly feeling like a small child who’d been asked his age.

The waitress returned to tell me they were plum out of Sliders.  Plum.  Out.  Another vegan perhaps?  Nah… she didn’t seem to have any issue with chopped liver or chicken. As more slider-serving waiters streamed past our table, she said she would check again. She was back in a nano-second to tell me they had 50 left of which I could have four. Again I requested two, and left 48 for the anxious looking folks who were yet to be seated.

Though they didn’t complain, Howard and Claire didn’t exactly wax poetic about their dinners, and after all the build-up, the Jewish Sliders were just ok (the Daily Double for $3.13 at McDonald’s is tastier and a better value).

When McDonald’s food is favorably compared to “Arizona’s Award Winning New York Deli,” it’s time for said deli to up its game.  They should start with some quality training time and not do job fairs at PETA.

And in the future, I bet Howard and Claire will make sure their restaurant of choice is open before trekking to the eastern edge of Scottsdale.